{"id":20191,"date":"2026-03-11T08:57:21","date_gmt":"2026-03-11T08:57:21","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/gpbookstore.org\/articles\/uncategorized\/she-turned-to-god-for-help-finding-mr-right\/"},"modified":"2026-04-10T06:09:29","modified_gmt":"2026-04-10T06:09:29","slug":"she-turned-to-god-for-help-finding-mr-right","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/gpbookstore.org\/articles\/positive-living\/friends-and-family\/marriage\/she-turned-to-god-for-help-finding-mr-right\/","title":{"rendered":"She Turned to God for Help Finding Mr. Right"},"content":{"rendered":"

I pulled myself onto the bathroom coun\u00adter so I could see my face in the mir\u00adror close-up. Red-rimmed eyes. Runny nose. Cheeks streaked with mascara. The next time you get to thinking you want a man in your life, <\/em>I told myself, remem\u00adber this. Remember how miserable you are.<\/em><\/p>\n

I held up my bare fin\u00adger, the one that had once boasted a gorgeous dia\u00admond ring. Divorced<\/a>. For the second time. I was a woman of accomplish\u00adment, a school principal. Mother to two beautiful girls. Yet I was a magnet for men who were not what they seemed. Why couldn\u2019t I get marriage right?<\/p>\n

That morning, my law\u00adyer had called to tell me my divorce was finalized. I had known it was com\u00ading, but the emotions that boiled up surprised me. Anger. Shame. Con\u00adfusion. I didn\u2019t want the girls to see me like this. I dropped them off at my sitter\u2019s house. Then I retreated to my bathroom and proceeded to have an epic pity party<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\u201cGod, do you even love me?\u201d I choked out. \u201cHow could you let this happen to me again? Don\u2019t you care about my children? Our happiness?\u201d<\/p>\n

I\u2019d grown up in New York City, raised by strict parents of Jamaican and Portuguese descent. They in\u00adstilled in my four siblings and me the importance of using our God-given abilities<\/a> to succeed in life.<\/p>\n

My moth\u00ader was a nurse, with a side business as a cake baker<\/a> and designer. My fa\u00adther owned a construction company and used his basement barbershop to minister to young men. We kids were expected to be just as driven. I pushed myself to excel in everything I did\u2014academics, piano, art. Marriage and family were sacred. Divorce<\/a> was something spoken of only in whispers.<\/p>\n

In college, I fell in love with litera\u00adture and writing. I earned a master\u2019s degree in education and got hired to teach sixth grade for a school district on Long Island, on top of teaching art<\/a> at an inner-city school.<\/p>\n

I often got assigned the kids the oth\u00ader teachers had given up on. The prob\u00adlem students. But I discovered I had a talent for keeping them engaged, motivated. I mentored several stu\u00addents outside the classroom and got involved in citywide programs. That\u2019s how I met Husband No. 1. He worked for the New York City<\/a> mayor\u2019s office. Smart, motivated, handsome. And he had Caribbean roots like mine. That confirmed he was the one. I didn\u2019t even have to pray on it. We married.<\/p>\n

Then I discovered how little we ac\u00adtually had in common. Like the fact that he was a smoker and didn\u2019t ex\u00adercise, while I loved in-line skating. We were opposites in our approach to handling finances and emotions. He had zero interest in praying or read\u00ading the Bible<\/a> together. Our first year of marriage, I got pregnant and gave birth to a baby girl we named Zaji. Par\u00adenthood didn\u2019t bring us any closer. We divorced a year later.<\/p>\n

My parents were supportive, but there was no hiding their disappoint\u00adment. I threw myself into my work and made plans to pursue a doctorate, re\u00adcruited by Arizona State for an inten\u00adsive program. Meanwhile, I mentored new teachers<\/a> in New York City. That\u2019s how I met Husband No. 2. I knew the pitfalls to look out for by then. He was regimented, financially responsible, raised in the church. And the way he folded laundry made me melt.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe\u2019s amazing!\u201d I gushed to God one night. I wasn\u2019t asking for confir\u00admation exactly, but it sure felt right.<\/p>\n

I got accepted into the ASU pro\u00adgram. Neither of us realized how demanding the program would be. I got pregnant and had our daughter Kesia. Raising two children added to the strain. I graduated and found a job as an assistant principal at a school an hour from our home. Zaji cried ev\u00adery day when I left for work.<\/p>\n

In time, I learned my husband and I had dif\u00adferent ideas about parenting and dis\u00adcipline. We stayed together for five years, but in the end, it was clear we couldn\u2019t go on. That\u2019s how I ended up with a second failed marriage.<\/p>\n

I stared in the bathroom mirror at my tear-stained reflection and shook my head. It was obvious I couldn\u2019t trust my own instincts. \u201cGod, what should I do?\u201d I said. \u201cWrite it in crayon for me.\u201d I needed the answer spelled out so clearly that a first grader would understand it.<\/p>\n

The previous few weeks, I\u2019d been going to a seminar for single people at my church, led by a guest pastor from the Bahamas. His words came to me now: \u201cWork on yourself.\u201d \u201cStart with your relationship with God.\u201d \u201cBe whole and seek whole people.\u201d<\/p>\n

Scanning the room, I found a big brown paper bag that was sticking out of my purse. I hopped down from the counter and snatched it up, then found an eyeliner pencil. Not a crayon but close enough. One by one I listed the things I wanted to work on:<\/p>\n

1. Develop a consistent prayer life.<\/em>
\n2. Connect more intentionally with my children.<\/em>
\n3. Learn to date myself.<\/em><\/p>\n

A total of 11 items.<\/p>\n

Then I heard something deep in my spirit: Just believe<\/a>.<\/em><\/p>\n

A sense of rightness filled me. I needed to follow the roadmap God had laid out, to trust in him more than I did in myself.<\/p>\n

I turned the bag over and began list\u00ading the qualities to seek in a husband. There was nothing about looks or a Caribbean ancestry. This was about the kind of man God wanted for me. A man who truly wanted to be a father, who treated his parents with love and respect. Who had the highest integrity and was a Christian in both word and deed. There were 12 qualities by the time I was done.<\/p>\n

In the months that followed, I fo\u00adcused on being the best person and mother I could be. I spent a half hour each morning praying<\/a> and reading Scripture, opening myself to God\u2019s presence. It was like a protein shake for my soul, a great way to start each new day.<\/p>\n

I established routines for the girls, giving them simple chores, limit\u00ading screen time and enrolling them in Sunday school<\/a>. I also scheduled weekly game nights and outings to the park. It wasn\u2019t easy being a single mother, but I felt closer to my girls than I ever had before.<\/p>\n

I joined a gym and worked out regularly. Took up painting again, even entered local art shows. And I went on dates with myself. I would hire a sitter and go to a movie on my own. Or out to a nice restau\u00adrant. I still felt lonely at times, but there was no longer a sense of des\u00adperation. My life was full. I had be\u00adcome whole.<\/p>\n

Nearly three years went by. One day, on a lark, I created a profile on a Christian dating<\/a> site. A few days later, I saw a message from a man named Tony in my in-box: \u201cHi. Would love to chat!\u201d He was handsome. Ca\u00adreer military. Divorced, with children. Interesting, but I wasn\u2019t going to leap into anything.<\/p>\n

I messaged him back. We hit it off. \u201cWould you like to meet for coffee at the bookstore?\u201d he asked one day.<\/p>\n

We wandered around the store on a Saturday afternoon. He laughed eas\u00adily, seemed genuinely interested in me. We gravitated to the section on nutrition and fitness, then fiction. He was looking for a book for his daugh\u00adter and asked for my suggestions. His thoughtful questions made it clear he was really listening.<\/p>\n

We went to the coffee bar. The con\u00adversation never lagged. He was a chief warrant officer with the Army. He had just come home from a deployment in Iraq<\/a>. He asked about my daugh\u00adters and talked about his parents, his upbringing, the importance of family and faith. He didn\u2019t have Caribbean roots, but I knew my parents would approve of his values.<\/p>\n

Neither of us wanted the date to end. We went to dinner. A movie after\u00adward. Then a jazz club. On the dance floor, he pulled me close and whis\u00adpered, \u201cJust believe.\u201d<\/p>\n

Only after I got home did I remem\u00adber I\u2019d heard those exact words three years earlier, that night of my bath\u00adroom pity party. Where was that list I\u2019d written? I found the paper bag stuffed in the bottom of my closet.<\/p>\n

I read over the qualities in a hus\u00adband I\u2019d felt directed to write. My pulse quickened. I could see so much of the list reflected in Tony. But before I opened my heart to him, there was someone I needed to ask first.<\/p>\n

\u201cGod, is he the one<\/a>?\u201d I prayed. \u201cHelp me to be sure.\u201d<\/p>\n

The next morning, after church, I waited impatiently for two young women at the end of the pew to exit. They\u2019d been staring at me throughout the whole service. Irritating.<\/p>\n

The taller of the two strangers turned and asked, \u201cAre you married?\u201d<\/p>\n

What business is it of yours? <\/em>I thought. But I said, \u201cWhy do you ask?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cGod asked my friend to tell you something,\u201d she said. \u201cI\u2019m trying to convince her to share it with you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOkay,\u201d I said slowly.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re not married, but you want to be, right?\u201d the shorter woman said.<\/p>\n

Anyone could see that I wasn\u2019t wearing a wedding ring. This is your divine message?<\/em><\/p>\n

The woman pressed on. \u201cYou have two girls who need a father figure. You\u2019ve been praying for a godly hus\u00adband, a protector. A man of integrity and honor.\u201d<\/p>\n

The woman kept talking, but I no longer saw her or her friend or the pew. I felt as if I were alone with God. \u201cGod has heard all your prayers, and they will be answered speedily. The man God has chosen for you, you\u2019ve either just met or will meet soon. Just believe.\u201d<\/p>\n

The message could not have been more clear if it had been written out in crayon.<\/p>\n

It was only after Tony asked me to marry him, four months later, that I shared this experience with him. By then he had shown he possessed every quality on my list and then some. We married nine months after our first date, on Valentine\u2019s Day, 2007. Fourteen years later, I\u2019ve memorized the list I wrote in eyeliner on that brown paper bag. I think of it as a love letter from the One<\/a> who knew what and who I needed far better than I did.<\/p>\n<\/p>\n

For more inspiring stories, subscribe to <\/em>Guideposts<\/strong><\/a> magazine<\/em>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I pulled myself onto the bathroom coun\u00adter so I could see my face in the mir\u00adror close-up. Red-rimmed eyes. Runny nose. Cheeks streaked with mascara. The next time you get to thinking you want a man in your life, I told myself, remem\u00adber this. Remember how miserable you are. I held up my bare fin\u00adger, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":28766,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"ep_exclude_from_search":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[173],"tags":[],"ppma_author":[1316],"class_list":["post-20191","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-marriage"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nShe Turned to God for Help Finding Mr. Right - Guideposts Articles<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"noindex, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"She Turned to God for Help Finding Mr. Right\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I pulled myself onto the bathroom coun\u00adter so I could see my face in the mir\u00adror close-up. 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