{"id":20692,"date":"2026-03-11T09:47:53","date_gmt":"2026-03-11T09:47:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/gpbookstore.org\/articles\/uncategorized\/4-reasons-to-keep-a-caregiving-journal\/"},"modified":"2026-04-10T06:10:36","modified_gmt":"2026-04-10T06:10:36","slug":"4-reasons-to-keep-a-caregiving-journal","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/gpbookstore.org\/articles\/positive-living\/health-and-wellness\/caregiving\/hope-and-inspiration\/4-reasons-to-keep-a-caregiving-journal\/","title":{"rendered":"4 Reasons to Keep a Caregiver Journal"},"content":{"rendered":"

Recently, I happened upon a stack of vintage suitcases filled with old journals. The one covered in pink cabbage roses took me back two decades. I opened it to find the notes I\u2019d kept during my mother\u2019s final battle with cancer<\/a>.<\/p>\n

As mom struggled onto the exam table, I had a sinking feeling in my gut. Dr. Huckabee\u2019s eyes locked with mine. \u201cWe need a bone scan right away, Roberta.\u201d I didn\u2019t need a scan to give me the heartcrushing news. Nurses know before they know. Mom\u2019s cancer was back.<\/i> <\/p>\n

Two decades later, my body still felt the anxiety in those words. This time there would be no cure. Only care.<\/p>\n

But something amazing happened in the moments it took to re-read my caregiver journal. Remembering the devoted attention Mom received her last year on earth, my anxiety became peace.<\/a> Joy, even. I realized that earth angels had shown up everywhere, often in the most unlikely places. As imperfect as it was, my own caregiving had been part of it all. Many of us know that keeping a journal helps to reduce stress; as an added benefit it is free and can be done anywhere (My car became my favorite spot to journal and pray<\/a>). But here are four other reasons that keeping a caregiving journal can make you happier, healthier\u2014and a more effective caregiver.<\/p>\n

Journaling helps you let go of perfectionism. <\/strong><\/h4>\n

I smiled (yes, smiled) as I gazed at the first dozen pages of Mom\u2019s caregiver journal. My entries were written in careful calligraphy with rose-patterned stickers dotting the pages. If her nurse-daughter couldn\u2019t be the perfect caregiver, she could at least cover her errant handwriting. An evening at Bob Evans changed my thinking. After a 10-hour shift at the hospital, I was waiting for a to-go order of Mom\u2019s favorite chicken with noodles. \u201cI\u2019m utterly exhausted,\u201d I wrote in my caregiver journal propped against the counter. \u201cHow long can I do<\/em> this and juggle everything else?\u201d As soon as I\u2019d gotten the words down, an inner voice taunted: What kind of daughter are you anyway? <\/em>I was ashamed\u2014and quickly blotted out my blemished thinking with large floral stickers. I didn\u2019t realize a little girl was watching: \u201cI paste stickers on my<\/em> boo-boos too,\u201d she said with a giggle. The sheer absurdity of those stickers turned my grief into giggles. From that moment on, I put my heart on paper with no expectations for performance. And I\u2019ve never forgotten: In journaling and <\/em>in caregiving, there is no place for perfection<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Journaling helps you feel less alone. <\/strong><\/h4>\n

In her eighties, Mom wasn\u2019t a candidate for aggressive treatment. Only chemo to shrink the tumors as a pain-control measure. As an oncology and hospice nurse, I\u2019d cared for many end-of-life patients<\/a> in similar situations. I knew what her future likely held. And I\u2019d seen it firsthand with my father, who for a full decade had battled excruciatingly-painful bone metastasis from prostate cancer. One evening I stopped to deliver my parents\u2019 evening meal and to set up their meds. I put on a brave front, but before I backed out of their driveway, I made this entry:<\/p>\n

What kind of a cruel joke is this, God? Now I have two parents whose cancer has spread to their bone. How much longer can I wear my I\u2019ve-got-it-all-together mask?<\/em><\/p>\n

Every fiber of my being wanted to be there for my parents. But I was exhausted. Angry at the unfairness of it all. Utterly alone, with not a soul I could admit it to. As I turned the key in the ignition of my Taurus, my eyes fell upon my open journal. My safe place where I could say anything. I wasn\u2019t alone at all. My every word had been heard.<\/p>\n

Journaling helps you prioritize<\/strong>.<\/h4>\n

At the time that I was busy taking my parents to medical appointments, I was also starting over at midlife after a divorce, trying to fix up a tumbledown cabin and juggling a full-time nursing job. There was no end in sight and seemingly no order to anything. Every day my mental To-Do list got longer. One Monday morning, I jotted the week\u2019s tasks in my journal. As I wrote, there was an astonishing order to my thoughts. I was hit with a stunning realization: Some of my entries were absolutely essential\u2014like Mom\u2019s lab work. Others, like those special crackers Dad wanted, could wait. My journal had brought clarity to my jumbled brain. As I separated necessities from niceties, I was able to move some items to the \u2018Don\u2019t Do Now\u2019 list. A new sense of calm revitalized me. I became a calmer caregiver<\/a> too.<\/p>\n

Journaling helps you remember the good times. <\/strong><\/h4>\n

As I revisited my caregiving journals, I was startled at the pockets of joy I\u2019d missed at the time. An entry about my father\u2019s radiation oncologist brought a smile. Dr. Leponto had eased Dad\u2019s pain, restored his independence, and added 12 more years to his life. He\u2019d improved so much he got to set up at his beloved flea market and play his fiddle in their bluegrass band. Dad had been so fond of Dr. Leponto, he\u2019d wanted a special sweater to wear when he went for his treatments. A lambswool, V-neck cardigan with patch pockets, to be exact. An L.L.Bean mail-order clerk located eight different colors in Dad\u2019s size. My father, who\u2019d never asked for anything in his life, settled the score from his recliner. \u201cDidn\u2019t have me any school clothes growing up. I want them all!<\/em>\u201d <\/em>Dad\u2019s diagnosis didn\u2019t change\u2014but his outlook sure did. A look back in my journals reminded me how much life was tucked inside those end-of-life moments.<\/p>\n

Mom\u2019s sweet smile and endearing ways. Dad\u2019s engaging sense of humor<\/a> in the worst of circumstances. Without knowing it, I\u2019d collected moments that would sustain me forever. When we journal, not only do we get to live twice, but the life lessons are right there in black and white for us.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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