{"id":21263,"date":"2026-03-11T10:49:33","date_gmt":"2026-03-11T10:49:33","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/gpbookstore.org\/articles\/uncategorized\/breast-cancer-a-spiritual-journey\/"},"modified":"2026-04-10T06:11:49","modified_gmt":"2026-04-10T06:11:49","slug":"breast-cancer-a-spiritual-journey","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/gpbookstore.org\/articles\/positive-living\/health-and-wellness\/living-with-cancer\/breast-cancer-a-spiritual-journey\/","title":{"rendered":"Breast Cancer: A Spiritual Journey"},"content":{"rendered":"

The crisp, clean scent was intoxicating. Like a cool breeze wafting in off the ocean… but where did it come from? I was alone in a stuffy eighth-floor law office late on a summer evening, finishing up my work as a document specialist. Occasionally one of the attorneys would also be working late, but not tonight. I was sitting at my computer, getting ready to log off and head home. Suddenly I froze. Raised my head. Sniffed the air. That scent…<\/p>\n

Wait! This was something familiar, a smell I knew. In my mind\u2019s eye, I saw him<\/em> so clearly. Thirty-five years hadn\u2019t dulled his features in my memory. Those blue eyes, that smile, and the golden-blonde hair that cascaded past his shoulders.<\/p>\n

Kenny<\/em>. My high school<\/a> boyfriend back in the 1970s. We had attended different high schools but met when we were 15 years old, playing in a county concert band. At the first rehearsal, I looked up from my place in the woodwind section with the other flautists and saw him behind the bass drum in the percussion section. We started talking at the break, and I never wanted to stop. Over the next few months, we saw each other whenever we could convince our parents to drive us. I had never felt so comfortable with anyone before… or since. I was 51 now, and no one had ever captured my heart like Kenny.<\/p>\n

I\u2019d been counting the days until Kenny\u2019s sixteenth birthday\u2014just 16 days before mine\u2014when he would get his driver\u2019s license. He had his own car, and we had a big date planned. Finally, no more chaperones! I couldn\u2019t wait. But the day before, Kenny called to cancel.<\/p>\n

\u201cI feel like we\u2019re getting too serious too fast,\u201d he told me. \u201cWe\u2019re young and I don\u2019t think we should, you know, get tied down. I just don\u2019t think we should see each other anymore.\u201d<\/p>\n

I spent that day\u2014and most of my own birthday, two weeks later\u2014in tears. As I got older and wiser, I told myself our relationship probably wouldn\u2019t have worked out anyway. I wanted to see the world; Kenny was content staying in Delaware. I moved on. I went to college, then made a life in the entertainment industry and lived in Philadelphia, then New York and Los Angeles. I eventually returned to Delaware to help care for my aging parents<\/a>. I pushed thoughts of Kenny to the back of my mind.<\/p>\n

Until now. That wonderful scent, out of nowhere.<\/p>\n

There were so many things I had loved about Kenny. All these years later, the smell of his long, lustrous hair was a clear memory. I don\u2019t know where it came from\u2014his shampoo? Herbal Essences was popular back then. Whatever it was, it was a scent I associated with joy and excitement<\/a>. With love.<\/p>\n

Call Kenny<\/em>. The thought just popped into my head. Then I laughed. Call the high school boyfriend I hadn\u2019t seen in 35 years and say… what exactly? \u201cHi, this is Robin. The high school girlfriend you dumped. Does your hair still smell great?\u201d How ridiculous!<\/p>\n

But the scent stayed on in my mind. Even after I drove home that night. Even days later. That smell had evoked memories, and now the thought of Kenny was a constant drumbeat. Then an old friend from my hometown called me up. He was putting together a concert in Rehoboth Beach.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s a reunion concert,\u201d he said. \u201cFor all of us who used to play in bands back when we were in school.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI wouldn\u2019t miss it,\u201d I told him. The second I hung up, I wondered, Is Kenny going to be there?<\/em><\/p>\n

I opened my calendar to write down the date. My heart skipped a beat. It was his birthday, I suddenly realized.<\/p>\n

Maybe I really was intoxicated by that scent. On impulse, I searched the White Pages. Kenny\u2019s parents were still listed at their old number. I found a listing for Kenny in a nearby town.\u00a0This is crazy<\/em>, I told myself.<\/p>\n

I took a deep breath and dialed. \u201cHi, this is Kenny.\u201d His voice after all these years jolted me, and I felt like I was a teenager again. Even if it was just a recording. \u201cLeave a message after the beep.\u201d<\/p>\n

I hung up. What message could I leave? He\u2019d think I was crazy for sure. Some kind of stalker. If the timing wasn\u2019t good for us back then, what were the chances it would be good for us now? Still, it would be great to see him after all these years. I dropped the phone number into my bag and decided to go to the concert on Saturday. If Kenny wasn\u2019t there, it just wasn\u2019t meant to be.<\/p>\n

The following night, I drove home from work and slowed to a stop at a traffic light.<\/p>\n

CALL KENNY\u2014NOW.<\/em><\/p>\n

It seemed as if a voice had called out to me. The thought was as clear as that scent in my office. Was I losing my mind? It\u2019s been 35 years!<\/em> I pulled off into a parking lot and rummaged through my bag. I pulled out the number and my cell phone. My heart beat faster with every ring. I almost prayed I\u2019d get the answering machine again.<\/p>\n

\u201cHello?\u201d Kenny\u2019s voice, live this time.<\/p>\n

I took a deep breath and tried to keep my voice steady. \u201cHi. Kenny? This is Robin Hill. I don\u2019t know if you remember…\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cRobin!\u201d Kenny said. \u201cIt\u2019s great to hear from you!\u201d Did he mean it? Well, at least he remembered me.<\/p>\n

\u201cI was just calling to ask if you were going to play in that reunion concert at the beach on Saturday,\u201d I said, trying hard to sound calm and cool.<\/p>\n

\u201cI heard about it, but I\u2019m not going,\u201d he said. \u201cWhy don\u2019t we have lunch? I\u2019d love to see you. Is next Friday okay?\u201d<\/p>\n

The following week, I was sitting in a cozy caf\u00e9 with Kenny. It felt like a dream. His hair was short now, but he was still the same sweet person. I felt just as comfortable talking to him as I had been back at that first county band practice. We\u2019d both experienced struggles in love and in life. I\u2019d survived breast cancer<\/a>; he\u2019d survived two heart attacks<\/a>. My parents had passed away, and his parents were in poor health. He had worked at the same job for 33 years, and I had hopped from one city to another, from job to job. Our lives had taken different paths, but we\u2019d been led back together. We weren\u2019t too young anymore.<\/p>\n

Kenny walked me to the parking lot after lunch. I held his hand. It seemed natural. We got to my car, and he leaned in to kiss me. He held me tight and I breathed in deep. His hair still smelled the same\u2014that wonderful, intoxicating scent.<\/p>\n

\u201cDo you think you\u2019ll ever grow your hair long again?\u201d I asked.<\/p>\n

Kenny did grow his hair out again. Long\u2014past his shoulders. And our relationship grew as well. We were married a year to the day of our reunion and the day before my birthday. Thirty-six years after our teenage breakup, I was married to the love of my life!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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