{"id":21510,"date":"2026-03-11T11:16:37","date_gmt":"2026-03-11T11:16:37","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/gpbookstore.org\/articles\/uncategorized\/forgiving-the-sins-of-the-father\/"},"modified":"2026-04-10T06:12:20","modified_gmt":"2026-04-10T06:12:20","slug":"forgiving-the-sins-of-the-father","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/gpbookstore.org\/articles\/positive-living\/health-and-wellness\/caregiving\/hope-and-inspiration\/stories-of-hope-for-caregivers\/forgiving-the-sins-of-the-father\/","title":{"rendered":"Forgiving the Sins of the Father"},"content":{"rendered":"

How did Mom ever put up with all of this? <\/em>I won\u00addered, not for the first time since my husband, Mike, and I had moved in with my elderly father after my mother passed away.<\/p>\n

The living room was a total mess. I stacked the condolence cards into a neat pile on the coffee table and swept a dying flower arrangement into the garbage pail. Then I stacked the now-empty boxes Mike and I had packed our things in to make the move to Dad\u2019s.<\/p>\n

Finally I picked up a laundry basket and gathered up the dirty socks Dad had dropped on the floor near the couch. I balanced the basket against my hip and headed down the hall. Cau\u00adtiously, I approached the open doorway to my parents\u2019 bedroom. Dad sat on the edge of the bed, fumbling with his gray-striped pajama top.<\/p>\n

\u201cDo you need any help?\u201d I asked.<\/p>\n

He didn\u2019t look up. \u201cThey must be making these buttons smaller than they used to,\u201d he grumbled.<\/p>\n

I sighed. Mike and I had moved in with Dad both to ease our financial burden after our pizza restaurant went under and to help Dad adjust to life without his wife of 52 years. Mike went back to school to become a pharmacy technician and was in class much of the day.<\/p>\n

I spent most of my time with Dad. I wasn\u2019t sure how long I could keep this up. Being with him made me feel all knotted up inside.<\/p>\n

To say Dad and I didn\u2019t get along would have meant we had some kind of relationship. We didn\u2019t. Not since I left home after high school. Picking out Mom\u2019s casket was the first thing we had ever done together. I was the sec\u00adond of four girls and that was what he called me: \u201cNumber Two.\u201d No name, just a digit.<\/p>\n

He was harsh and judgmental with my sisters and me, and he had a temper. Once we were grown, none of us girls wanted anything to do with Dad. It was Mom we loved and stayed in touch with.<\/p>\n

My younger sister and I were shocked at what we found when we visited Dad in the weeks after Mom\u2019s funeral. Dad\u2019s medications were scattered haphaz\u00adardly on the counter and he had no idea which was which. He frequently lost his footing on the uneven terrain of the acreage surrounding the house.<\/p>\n

The landscaped flower beds and lawn he\u2019d always showed off now looked more like a vacant lot, overgrown with weeds and strewn with broken gardening equip\u00adment. It was clear Mom had picked up the slack the past few years.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe needs more help than we can give him,\u201d my younger sister said. \u201cHe needs to be in a retirement home.\u201d<\/p>\n

I was inclined to agree, but mem\u00adories of Mom wouldn\u2019t let me. She loved Dad\u2014Lord only knew why\u2014and she would not have wanted to see him forced out of his home. Along with our business, Mike and I lost our house and needed a place to live. So moving in with Dad seemed like a solution for all of us.<\/p>\n

I\u2019d thought it was God\u2019s timing, but now I wondered, Lord, how can I take care of this man I don\u2019t really care for? Teach me how to love the unloveable.<\/em><\/p>\n

I looked at Dad, his pajama shirt all twisted. The few buttons he had managed to close didn\u2019t match up right. It might have been comical, if it weren\u2019t so sad. I was so used to dreading him that I was surprised to feel a twinge of sympathy. \u201cYou know, Dad, if you want, I can sew the buttons closed, then you could just slip the top over your head.\u201d<\/p>\n

Dad nodded. \u201cThat\u2019s a good idea,\u201d he said.\u00ad<\/p>\n

A compliment? First one I could re\u00admember. I put the laundry basket down and sat next to him on the bed. Slowly I rebuttoned his top.<\/p>\n

It felt so strange! Growing up, I lived in constant fear of the man.<\/p>\n

No matter how awful he\u2019s been, he\u2019s helpless now, <\/em>I thought, fastening the last button. He needed someone. But, Lord, why me?<\/em><\/p>\n

For the first few weeks, I clung to the hope that somehow I could teach Dad to live independently and that this living situation was only temporary. But soon it was obvious that he had age-related dementia.<\/p>\n

He couldn\u2019t learn how to wash his clothes or vacuum the floor. He couldn\u2019t shop for food, much less make it himself. All the things Mom used to do for him. I drove him to doc\u00adtors\u2019 appointments and helped him go from using a walker to pushing himself in a wheelchair.<\/p>\n

\u201cDeep down, I know he appreciates you,\u201d Mike told me.<\/p>\n

\u201cDoes he?\u201d I wondered.<\/p>\n

One day, Mike went into town and I got to weeding the flower bed. Dad sat on the porch in his favorite wooden chair and watched two gray squirrels chasing each other around the big old oak trees that shaded the lawn.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, Dad,\u201d I said, standing and brushing the dirt from the knees of my blue jeans, \u201cI should go in and see about putting something on for lunch.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhatever you think is best, Babe,\u201d Dad said, gazing out over the acreage.<\/p>\n

I paused in mid-stride. Did he just call me \u201cBabe\u201d? It sounded a lot bet\u00adter than \u201cNumber Two.\u201d I heated some soup and brought it out to him.<\/p>\n

With a shaky hand, he slurped it up. \u201cThank you,\u201d he said when he was done. Another first!<\/p>\n

Lord, are you playing with me? <\/em>I asked.<\/p>\n

A friend volunteered to come over once a week to sit with Dad so that I could get out and run some errands. The first time, she visited with Dad on the front porch so that they could get to know one an\u00adother. \u201cHow long have you lived here?\u201d she asked him.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh, I don\u2019t know, maybe two or three years,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n

\u201cNo, Dad,\u201d I said, \u201cyou\u2019ve lived here for over ten years.\u201d<\/p>\n

A flummoxed look came across his face. He struggled for words. \u201cThat\u2019s the tough thing about growing old,\u201d he finally said. \u201cSome days you can\u2019t re\u00admember where you were born, when you were born or even if you were born.\u201d<\/p>\n

He looked so beaten and vulnerable. I felt myself soften. \u201cWhen I come back, why don\u2019t we go for a ride on the quad,\u201d I said. The four-wheel \u201cPutt-Putt\u201d was the only way Dad could make it to the furthest reaches of the property. \u201cWecan check out the pear trees at the edge of the field.\u201d<\/p>\n

Dad perked up. \u201cSounds good to me,\u201d he said, mouth curled up into a smile.<\/p>\n

That afternoon, I drove the quad up to the front porch. \u201cHop on,\u201d I said.<\/p>\n

Dad shook his head. \u201cLet me drive,\u201d he said. One of the few things he could still do.<\/p>\n

I hesitated. Dad shook his head again, stubbornly. Oh, Lord, here we go. <\/em>I hopped off. Dad grasped the handlebars and pulled himself onto the front seat. I climbed on in back of him. \u201cHold on tight,\u201d he instructed.<\/p>\n

We took off toward the end of the field. Leaning in against Dad, I felt the warmth of his body against mine. I couldn\u2019t remember a time when we\u2019d been that close.<\/p>\n

\u201cLook,\u201d Dad said, pointing ahead. Two white-spotted deer were standing at the corner of the orchard. We stopped and watched in silence as they grazed. The peaceful silence of two people sa\u00advoring a moment together.<\/p>\n

Slowly we wove our way back to the house. Dad climbed off and I held out my arm to support him. \u201cHey, Dad,\u201d I said, \u201cI picked up those ice cream bars you like when I did the shopping. Do you want one?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMy favorite,\u201d he said. I helped him into his wheelchair and pushed him to the front porch. He looked up at me. \u201cMargaret?\u201d<\/p>\n

My heart skipped a beat. I almost didn\u2019t recognize my name coming from his lips. \u201cYes, Dad?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThank you,\u201d he said. \u201cYou take such good care of me.\u201d<\/p>\n

I felt the knot inside me come loose. This was the man I had once found im\u00adpossible to love. Dad and I had both been brought low by circumstances beyond our control, and in this new place, there wasn\u2019t room for anger or resentment. There was peace, tender\u00adness, even love.<\/p>\n

That was really why God had brought me here, I realized. Not out of despera\u00adtion, but for a chance to settle the past and to finally have a relationship with my father.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m here for you, Dad,\u201d I said, rest\u00ading my hand on his shoulder, \u201cas long as I need to be.\u201d<\/p>\n

Reduce the stress of caregiving and avoid burnout with these tips and resources<\/a>.<\/em><\/strong><\/p><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

How did Mom ever put up with all of this? I won\u00addered, not for the first time since my husband, Mike, and I had moved in with my elderly father after my mother passed away. The living room was a total mess. 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