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6 Ways to Find Thanks in Difficult Times

Posted on March 10, 2026April 10, 2026 by Michelle Cox

The season for gratitude and thanksgiving has arrived. It’s a wonderful time of year—especially when things are going well. But how do you find the faith to be thankful in hard times?

My heart is heavy for a number of friends who are weathering tough times. I know of one in another state who will probably be alone on Thanksgiving and Christmas. At a time when so much revolves around family and friends, that can’t be easy.

Other friends are strained financially. The dollars coming in just aren’t enough to cover expenses. Some have gone months without finding a job, despite sending out dozens of resumes. Health issues have dogged others as well as dealing with death, broken marriages or troubled children.

How to find a spirit of gratitude when life is hard? Here’s what God has taught me through my own difficult times:

1) Search for bright spots.
Even when things are bad, there was always something to thank Him for, no matter how small.

2) Help others.
Caring about others and reaching out to them has always helped put my own problems in perspective.

3) Immerse yourself in His Word.
The God who loves us so much that He gave His life for us has tucked hundreds of sweet and precious promises in our Bibles. And somehow, whenever I really need one, He puts His spotlight of grace on it and highlights it for me.

4) Sing.
Sounds crazy, doesn’t it? But during one of the darkest times that my husband and I ever walked through, we put some praise and worship music on and sat at our dining room table and sang. I still tear up when I think about how God used those moments to comfort my husband’s heart.

5) Pray.
There’s something about spending time with Him that provides peace during life’s storms.

6) Praise Him no matter what.
It’s hard to fathom in the middle of a tough time what the best outcome may be. So thank God in advance for what He’s going to do. It will be for the good of all.

God says it best in Psalm 50:15: Call upon Me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you shall glorify Me.

6 Ways to Build Hope in the New Year

Posted on March 10, 2026April 10, 2026 by Therese Borchard

I’ve noticed a pattern to my attitude about starting a new year. The harder the year prior, the more I look forward to January 1. It’s like turning in a really bad English paper and getting to start over on a new assignment. A blank page and a new year give us the one ingredient needed for healing, peace, and success: hope. The trick is sustaining that hope through the seasons of the year, especially on the days when it’s hard to believe that our tomorrow will be better than our today. Here are some ways to hang on to hope in the new year.

1. Visualize a New Year’s You

Forget about your New Year’s resolution. Only 8 percent of people keep them anyway. Instead visualize the person you want to become—including as many details as possible. Visualizations are a powerful way of reprogramming our thoughts and accessing hope. We learn through pictures. In fact, 65 percent of people are visual learners according to the Social Science Research Network, as compared to auditory or other learning styles. When I do this exercise, I visualize a woman with a stronger sense of self, less dependent on the approval of other people. She has returned to her passion of being a mental health advocate, inspiring persons through her writing and speaking. She is a devoted wife and mother, and a more responsible dog owner.

2. Plan a Hope Event

You might need a hope booster half-way through the year, so plan a retreat or some other event that will refuel you with optimism and energy. I am planning on walking Camino de Santiago, the Way of St. James, in May of this year. The famous pilgrimage stretches 778 kilometers from St. Jean Port de Pied to Santiago de Compostela in Spain and is associated with healing and spiritual transformation. You need not trek across Europe for five weeks, of course. A weekend by the lake or some time with a friend will serve the same purpose.

3. Strengthen Your Spiritual Life

Without fail I run out of hope every time I forget about God’s hand in my life and place all my trust in the things of this world. Last year I grasped the helm of my life so tightly that I developed blisters. In a moment of despair, I turned to the Bible and read Psalm 118:8, “It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in humans.” Like all relationships, though, our connection with God takes work. It requires a commitment to prayer, opportunities to discern what God is saying. The beginning of the year is a great time to design a spiritual practice that will help you recognize the divine imprints in your life.

4. Find Hope Buddies

Friends and loved ones are messengers of hope. They shed light on our strengths in moments of weakness and provide perspective when we fail to see the truth. Fellowship is how addicts are able to stay clean, a core component of twelve-step groups that leads to long-term recovery, and how people crawl out from the depths of depression. Identify those people in your life that serve as your buttress and find ways to connect with them throughout the year. Keep them near.

5. Carve out Solitude

Novelist and Anglican clergyman Laurence Sterne once wrote, “In solitude the mind gains strength and learns to lean upon itself.” I have found that when I cram my day too tightly with work and motherhood responsibilities, I stop making my own decisions and become vulnerable to the traps of addiction and depression. Being alone is not easy. It requires confronting the demons that stand in the way of Christian living. However, only in the silence can we hear the whisper of truth that leads us to peace.

6. Gather Your Hope Reminders

For Emily Dickinson, “hope is the thing with feathers.” For me, it’s roses and butterflies and rainbows. They remind me of the energy force that lies within me, the tenacious spirit that will not give up. Therefore, I put roses on my desk, carry a butterfly keychain, and look for rainbows whenever the sun peaks out through a rainstorm. If you don’t have a symbol of hope, choose one now, and display it in place that you see every day.

Last year was one of my most difficult years. I fumbled, got lost, and made several mistakes. It was like the really bad English paper I wrote on the life of Mary Todd Lincoln, where I began each sentence with “Mary Todd Lincoln.” I got a D. My inspiration returned with the next paper, thank God.

Life is like that. We get a new year. A blank page. Make this one your masterpiece by keeping up your supply of hope.

6 Steps to Walking Humbly with God

Posted on March 10, 2026April 10, 2026 by Elizabeth Peale Allen

Humility has gotten a bad reputation in recent years. Many people now think it’s a synonym for low self-esteem. But Moses “was a very humble man, more humble than any man on the face of the earth” (Numbers12:3). He certainly wasn’t lacking in assertiveness! He stood up to Pharaoh, dealt with the rebellious Israelites and spent 40 long years doing one of the toughest jobs in all of history.

Moses is pretty clear evidence that God’s definition of humility is different from what the world would have us believe. Moses was absolutely certain that God was the all-powerful creator and ruler of universe Yet Moses also understood that his life, worthless as it might seem, was in some inexplicable way of infinite importance. This paradox between being nothing and everything is the beginning of humility.

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“Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up,” it says in James 4:10. We hear the same idea echoed in the Gospel: “For whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted” (Matthew 23:12). God honors us when we are humble, in part because we are open to His guidance. It’s only then that He can show us what is right and teach us in His way (Psalm 25:9).

Six steps to walking humbly with God

Jesus said, “Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls” (Matthew 11:29). To be like Christ, we must follow His example of humility. How can we learn to walk humbly with our God?

1. Remember who’s in charge—and praise Him!
It’s hard keep things in perspective if we don’t remember who is Lord! Psalm 90 is a good place to start.

2. Pray for a humble heart.
Ask the Holy Spirit to open your eyes to the ways in which pride gets in the way of your relationships.

3. Pay more attention to your own faults than to the flaws of others.
Confess your failings, but don’t obsess—move on!

4. Don’t hide behind your dignity—it’s pride’s favorite hiding place.
Your real value lies in God’s eyes, not in the eyes of the world. Remember: “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble” (1 Peter 5:5).

5. Try not to watch yourself worship.
Give all of your heart and mind to God.

6. Serve others.
The fastest way to humility is the way Christ chose. “For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve…” (Mark 10:45).

6 Simple Ways to Find Comfort in Tough Times

Posted on March 10, 2026April 10, 2026 by Holly Lebowitz Rossi

When things go sideways in my life—a loss, a relationship struggle, work stress or frightening world events—I try to put at least some of whatever energy I have into finding ways to stay calm and comforted. Without such supports, I can’t be of service to myself or to anyone who might need my help in a crisis.

The famous line in Psalm 121 says, “I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come?” Well, sometimes help comes from classic comforts—a favorite food, an old sweatshirt, the embrace of a friend or an inspirational text.

But some comforts are found in slightly more unexpected places. To navigate a tough time while staying on a positive life path asks us to be creative in seeking out support anywhere we can find it. Here are six that I turn to again and again.

1) Comforting Smells
Scents from lavender to rose, cinnamon to vanilla, delivered through plants, essential oils or a soothing stovetop simmer, signal your brain to relax and stay in the present moment.

2) Childhood Objects
Turn to simple items like a blanket, stuffed animal or even an action figure. These might be tucked away in a closet, but if they soothed you in your younger years, they can certainly do so again.

3) Nature
It’s permanent, yet ever-changing. Being in nature’s presence can remind you that your life, like the oceans, mountains, and forests, can remain steady through a lot of change. Feeling awed by nature can also help you make better, more positive decisions in stressful moments.

4) Reliable Reads
Cozy up to books that you have read again and again. My go-to is my collection of Cathy comics that I discovered during my teen years and never fail to ground me and put things in humorous perspective.

5) Instrumental Music
It’s music that won’t invade your already-stressed mind with emotionally triggering lyrics, but will occupy your ears with soft, soothing sounds.

6) Soothing Self-Talk
Positive self-talk can remind you what you already know—that you are loved, safe and strong enough to weather life’s storms. It can also help you let go of any guilt or negativity around how you feel you “should” be handling a crisis. There are no instruction manuals for tough times—doing your best from moment to moment is all you need to ask of yourself.

How do you find comfort in tough times?

6 Positive Ways to Celebrate Labor Day

Posted on March 10, 2026April 10, 2026 by Holly Lebowitz Rossi

I have a small stand of fruit trees in my side yard, and this year, the peach tree in particular had an epic yield. We stopped counting the harvest at 347 peaches from the one single—dwarf—tree! As I shared bag after bag of ripe peaches with neighbors and friends, I couldn’t help thinking with pleasure of how I was inviting them to literally enjoy “the fruits of my labors.”

Now, how much actual “labor” had gone into this tremendous peach harvest? I use organic methods, so there had been no spraying or fertilizing to do. I had pruned the tree (severely) in the early spring, true. But really, the most intensive part of the work of producing the trove of fruit was simply the act of planting the tree, something I did eight years ago.

The joy of my embarrassment of peachy riches got me thinking about other everyday labors that yield tremendous fruits. On this Labor Day, check in with your daily routines to see how many of these—and how many others—resonate with seemingly small tasks you complete, to reap great benefits.

1) Fruit: When today’s mail arrived, you had someplace to put it.
Labor: You set up a desk or counter space to help keep yourself organized.

2) Fruit: You shared an enjoyable meal with your family.
Labor: You went to the store and made a plan for what would be good to eat this week.

3) Fruit: You had a fun summer vacation.
Labor: You made reservations and researched activities at your destination.

4) Fruit: You drove somewhere and dealt calmly with an unexpected traffic jam.
Labor: You stopped at the gas station and were prepared with a full tank.

5) Fruit: You know what time it is.
Labor: You correctly “sprung forward” to Daylight Savings Time back in March.

6) Fruit: You navigated a difficult situation with grace and calm.
Labor: You have been gradually and successfully building your toolbox of positive life skills.

These might see like small things, micro “accomplishments” that hardly warrant celebrating. But though not all labor is paid, it’s worth noting that if you look closely enough, you can feel that all labor does bear fruit.

6 Ideas to Make the Most of Your Lenten Journey

Posted on March 10, 2026April 10, 2026 by The Editors

The season of Lent is here! Making your Lenten journey special doesn’t have to be difficult. There are many fun and easy ways to gain a deeper understanding of the meaning of Lent. Here are six ideas to get you started.

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1. Pray the Stations of the Cross as a family.

Go on your Lenten journey together as a family. Praying the Stations of the Cross together as a family can be a great way to build spiritual connection during Lent. Taking time to pray the 14 stations can help children understand the story of Jesus’ last walk on Earth. Encourage kids to ask questions about what’s happening in each one, note interesting symbols, share the message of Jesus’ experiences, and discuss ways you might apply his teachings in everyday life.

2. Give up social media for Lent.

Giving up social media for Lent is an excellent opportunity to step away from the online world and explore what else life has to offer. For Christians, it can be a chance to practice their faith and focus more on spiritual matters and relationships with family and friends. Spending 40 days without Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat can be a challenging part of your Lenten journey, but, in the end, it leads to inner peace and a greater appreciation of our connections offline. When Lent comes around again, who knows? You might find that this break was just what you needed to recharge!

3. Make a special effort to be patient with your loved ones.

The season of Lent is a spiritual time for many people, in which they focus on how to improve relationships. One of the essential components of being a loving and devoted partner or family member is patience. Lent is an ideal time to think about making a special effort to be patient with your loved ones. Even through difficult times or disagreements, showing patience towards your family members will help build strong and steadfast relationships that will stand the test of time. Keeping an open heart and mind will allow you to have better conversations and create meaningful moments of understanding that are much more likely when patience takes precedence over frustration.

4. Give up meat for Lent and try some new vegetarian recipes.

Another way to practice fasting during your Lenten journey is to give something up. Perhaps try not eating meat during Lent. Trying out new vegetarian dishes can be a great way to stay motivated on your meatless journey. Not sure where to start? Search online for recipes and look for something that tickles your taste buds. If you’re feeling creative, try inventing your unique recipes – feel free to experiment! Giving up meat for Lent is a refreshing challenge, but don’t let the chance pass you by – dip your spoon into something new this season!

5. Spend time each day reading Scripture or a spiritual book.

Taking time each day to read Scripture or a spiritual book is a great way to fill your soul with joy and purpose. It’s an activity that can provide perspective, peace, and growth for any faith journey. Reading these texts allows you to gain insight into how others may be feeling or how to navigate your own emotions in the wake of struggles or triumphs. Whether your goal is to learn more about Scripture, live a faithful life, or just relax and find respite from the daily hustle and bustle, simply making time for daily spiritual reading can make all the difference.

6. Go on a retreat for Lent.

Going on a retreat is an ideal way to spend quality self-reflective time, clear your head, and refocus your faith. You don’t have to go anywhere extravagant. Sometimes, a short visit to a local park or museum can make all the difference. It’s essential during any retreat to set aside some time for spiritual practices like prayer, meditation, and journaling. Making the most of your prayer time will help you make the most of Lent.

Did this article inspire you to reflect on your own Lenten journey? What are some things that you would like to change about yourself during this special time? Be sure to check out more great Lent content below.

READ MORE TO HELP YOUR LENTEN JOURNEY:

5 Ways to Stay Spiritually Fit

Posted on March 10, 2026April 10, 2026 by Michelle Cox

The same traits you need to become physically fit also apply to being spiritually fit. Michelle Cox explores five of them:

“I’d maybe join you if you ever looked like you enjoyed it.” Our neighbor laughingly made that comment to my husband, Paul, as he jogged by Shannon’s house. Paul usually ran into him near the end of his 3-4 mile run, after he’d climbed the steep hill by Shannon’s house. I doubt many people would be running with joy at that point on the trail.

Paul loved exercising and was sad when knee surgery put an end to his days of jogging down our country roads. Like Shannon, I never joined Paul on his run—partly because he did it early in the morning, and I am so not a morning person, and partly because I had claimed that verse in 1 Timothy 4:8 as my life verse. You know, the one that says, “Bodily exercise profits little.”

I suspect I took it a little out of context, but it always sounded good when I said it. But then I started having some health problems, with my blood pressure and blood sugar inching up to a place where my doctor wasn’t happy with me.

So I started walking each day, building up my time and distance. It was a new habit that’s lasted more than four years now. I never got to the point that I was excited about doing it, but I did love it when I began seeing good results from my lab work and when I started feeling better and had more energy. And, miracle of miracles, I even lost some weight! Those days or consistent exercise paid off.

Being physically fit is important for all of us, but it’s even more important for us to be spiritually fit. Here are a few traits that will help you become spiritually strong:

1) Be consistent.
Determine to be faithful. Daily consistency is key. Time spent in prayer and reading the Bible will make you stronger as you run the race of life.

2) Do it anyway.
There will be days when you won’t feel like it—but do it anyway.

3) Find a mentor.
Find someone who will mentor and encourage you—someone you can have deep conversations with about God and faith.

4) Find positive thinkers.
Surround yourself with like-minded people. They will inspire you to keep going—and they won’t discourage you from following Him.

5) Inspire others.
Be an inspiration for others. Let them see the joy of Jesus in you . . . even during difficult times.

I think Paul sums it up best in 2 Timothy 4:7, “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.”

Just like our neighbor watched Paul on his daily run, other folks are watching to see how we run the race for God. I sure hope they’ll see us running with joy!

5 Ways to Regain Your Childlike Wonder as an Adult

Posted on March 10, 2026April 10, 2026 by Kaylin Kaupish

Have you ever watched a young child see something for the first time? An animal at the zoo, a towering skyscraper, a night sky full of stars? This wonder and awe they hold for everything around them is an important part of being a child— and it can be an example for how we should strive to experience the world as adults!

“A sense of wonder speaks of our hunger to be moved, to be engaged and impassioned with the world,” says speaker and author, Gregg Levoy. He suggests that viewing life from a place of wonder is a great way to live fully, deepen our spirituality and connect with God. He also says that experiencing wonder becomes harder as we age—but why?

“None of the reasons are developmental,” says Levoy. “The passion for learning doesn’t naturally wane as we get older. Something gets in the way.” For example, being told not to ask too many questions, focusing on achieving instead of discovering, or not having adults in our lives who exhibit a sense of wonder.

However, that does not mean our childlike wonder can’t be regained. It is always with us; we just need to take steps to find it again.

Here are Levoy’s tips to reconnect with our childlike wonder:

Get up and get out

Getting out into the world— whether it’s going to a new destination via plane, or simply taking a new path on your daily walk— is an incredible way to stoke a sense of wonder in your life. “Growing your sense of wonder is often about simply getting out from behind the desk or [away from] the chores, habits and routines in your everyday life,” said Levoy. “It’s about creating opportunities to encounter wonder by putting yourself in its path.”

See your life through another’s eyes

Even though we are all surrounded by the beauty of God’s world, we can sometimes forget to see it that way. The things we see every day, like our driving route to work or the aisles of our grocery store, start to feel dull. “Try looking with renewed wonder at something you’ve looked at a thousand times,” said Levoy. “Reintroduce yourself to the charms of your town by seeing it through the eyes of a visitor, or to the wonders of the world through the eyes of your children.”

Use all your sense

Levoy says we refer to it as a “sense of wonder” because it requires just that. Sense. Our five senses should play a huge part in our lives so we can fully take in the wonderful world around us. Savor the taste of a favorite family recipe. Close your eyes as you listen to your favorite song. Literally stop and smell the roses! “You can greatly extend your senses, and thus your apprehension of wonders, by utilizing new lenses,” said Levoy. “[Look at the world through] magnifying glasses, binoculars, microscopes, [and] telescopes…”

Seek out wondrous displays

There are many things that are sure to elicit wonder in us— a colorful sunset, a synchronized flock of birds, a firework show. Bringing these things into your life, and even making them a small part of your busy schedule, will make wonder a part of your everyday life. “Stop and stare whenever you enter grand lobbies and atriums,” Levoy said. “Get a season pass to the art museum. Put the ‘Astronomy Picture of the Day’ website on the toolbar of your computer.”

Look at things from new angels

Sometimes all we need is a change of perspective to turn the ordinary into the fascinating. For example, imagining the rushing waters that created the Grand Canyon puts it in a whole new light. Or picturing the builders who managed to erect shimmering skyscrapers makes them that much more extraordinary. Levoy has a way to make even a glorious sunset more wondrous. “If you’re watching a sunset, stare not at the sun, but at the Earth,” he said. “You’ll begin to make out what’s really going on. The sun is not setting. The Earth is rising, spinning hugely in space. You’ll begin to make out its actual motion and remember that you live on a planet hanging in midair.”

5 Ways to Keep Your Teenager on Track This Lent Season

Posted on March 10, 2026April 10, 2026 by The Editors

Lent is a time for reflection and repentance, deepening our relationship with God—especially for our teens. It offers a great opportunity for your teenager to stay on track with their faith and belief. Here are some ideas to keep them focused and motivated during this special season.

Why Lent is Important for Teenagers

Did you know that the teen years are an important part of a person’s spiritual journey? According to Dr. Lisa Miller, a professor and clinical psychologist at Columbia University who studies spirituality in the lives of children and teenagers, we go through a kind of spiritual surge in our teenage years. “During physical puberty, there is an augmentation in our capacity for transcendent awareness and experiences,” she says.

In fact, various religions see the teenage years as a spiritually significant time. In the Jewish faith, children have a bar or bat mitzvah at 12 or 13 years old. Children in Catholic and other Christian churches have their confirmation between ages 11 to 17.

Lent can be an important time for a teenager’s spiritual life, especially if you are there to guide them through it. Here are 5 tips for ways to celebrate the Lenten season with your teenagers.

5 Tips to Celebrate Lent With Your Teen

1. Talk to your teenager about what they hope to accomplish during Lent.

Taking the time to have an honest discussion with your teen, ask them what they hope to accomplish during Lent. Invite them to be creative and think holistically, beyond the traditional observances, such as fasting or saying extra prayers. While teens might not always feel comfortable talking with their parents about their personal faith matters, building a safe and open space that allows them to express themselves without judgment fosters a strong faith-based foundation into adulthood.

2. Help your teen set realistic Lent goals

We all want to achieve great things in life, but setting the right kinds of goals can be challenging. Help your child set goals that are ambitious and high-reaching, yet realistic and constructive. One way to ensure this is by breaking down the goal into smaller ones that work together, taking baby steps and rewarding themselves at each stage for their effort and work. This can help build positive habits and keep morale up and makes sticking with goals much easier.

3. Create a plan to help them meet their Lent goals, including daily or weekly check-ins

Having an effective plan makes it easier to stay on track and pushes your teenager towards success. Those who have chosen to observe Lent can start by developing a clear plan of action that includes daily or weekly check-ins to ensure they are working towards their overall goal. It’s important to keep in mind that sticking with the plan and remaining accountable along the way is integral to achieving the desired outcome. With proper implementation, setting and following through, can make this season especially rewarding and spiritual.

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4. Encourage and support them throughout the Lenten season

Encouraging and empowering teens to stay focused and dedicated throughout Lent can make all the difference. Here are some ways you can keep your teen on track all through Lent:

Reach out through loving texts, emails or handwritten letters
Set time to talk about their feelings, goals and progress during the season
Gift items like faith journals, prayer cubes or Bibles to keep them focused on their journey

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5. Celebrate your teen’s successes at the end of Lent

After an incredible Lenten journey of self-discipline and internal growth, it’s important to recognize the successes of teenagers. Whether this is staying away from their favorite late-night snacks or rising early for prayer, celebrating their dedication to live better, faithful lives can help encourage them during this oftentimes challenging season. With celebrations, such as family board game nights or inviting friends out for dessert, there are many ways young people can enjoy the end of Lent in a meaningful and spiritual way.

No matter how you and your teen choose to celebrate the Lenten season, there is always room for bonding—both with each other, and with God. Keep them on track, guide them through the season, and remember to celebrate together when the season comes to an end. Making Lent an important spiritual time for yourself and your teen will bring joy to your family year after year.

READ MORE ABOUT LENT FOR TEENS AND FAMILIES:

5 Ways to Cope with Grief Over Missed Occasions

Posted on March 10, 2026April 10, 2026 by Alikay Wood

The spread of Covid-19 has shut down schools and workplaces and led to the cancellation of weddings, vacations, graduations and numerous other special occasions. Many people are having to navigate the grief of these losses from their own homes and struggling to make peace with their new reality. Guideposts.org spoke with grief expert David Kessler about how to manage the specific kind of grief that people are experiencing from the cancellation of much looked forward to events.

Kessler is the author of numerous bestselling books on grief including his latest, Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief. He spent years talking to people about their grief, and is finding that the emotions people are experiencing because of the coronavirus are very different from other types of grief.

“We’re familiar with the death of a loved one,” Kessler said. “[We’re unfamiliar] with dealing with job losses, financial losses…the loss of that perfect wedding that you’ve probably been planning since you were nine. These are huge losses people are dealing with.”

Here are a few of Kessler’s suggestions for managing these very unique kinds of grief:

1. Acknowledge what you are feeling

One of the things people are struggling with is acknowledging that what they are feeling is not just discomfort, stress or sadness, but grief. But as Kessler explains, that’s exactly what many of us are facing.

“Grief is change we did not want. We’re all dealing with changes that none of us are wanting,” Kessler said.

The first step to navigating your grief, Kessler says, is to acknowledge it.

“These are huge losses people are dealing with,” Kessler said. “It helps to name them and recognize them so we can be sad about them and let those feelings through.”

2. Accept that your grief counts

Kessler said there are very few hard and fast rules for grieving, but one that he adheres to is that we can’t compare our losses.

“If your child was planning on studying abroad, and now that’s been ruined, that’s their worst grief,” he explained. “If a wedding has been canceled, that’s the bride, the groom’s and their family’s worst grief.”

Health and safety are things to be grateful for. But just because no one has died doesn’t mean you don’t have a reason to grieve.

3. Allow yourself to feel it

Kessler said it isn’t enough to acknowledge your emotions, you have to actually let yourself feel them. If you feel sad, and then feel guilty about being sad because other people have it worse, that makes the grieving process more difficult.

“If you fully feel the sadness, it moves through you,” Kessler said. “If we can just feel it, rather than suppress it, we’re going to do much better.”

4. Recognize what’s in your control

One of the scariest things about the spread of the coronavirus is that it is completely out of our hands. But just because this is a global issue doesn’t mean there aren’t things individuals can do to take action.

Kessler said focusing on the things that are in your control can help people let go of the events they may be missing. You can’t control the cancellation of a funeral or graduation, but you do have control to make sure your hands are washed, that you are practicing social distancing and eating healthy.

5. Look for meaning

Kessler worked closely with Elizabeth Kübler-Ross, whose research created the five stages of grief, to add a sixth stage called finding meaning. In his opinion, this final stage is something everyone will have to do in the wake of the pandemic.

For example, Kessler said those whose wedding is cancelled might end up with a stronger marriage for going through these hard times together. A missed family vacation may bring the family closer together through long distance calls and video chats. Sheltering at home can help individuals focus on what really matters in their life. Focusing on these things can help make grief meaningful.

As Kessler said, “when a bone is broken, the place where it is broken becomes the strongest place in the bone.”

Kessler is hosting a free online grief support group for anyone who would like to join.

5 Ways to Banish Winter Gloom

Posted on March 10, 2026April 10, 2026 by Rick Hamlin

January. I don’t know what it is–the short days and long nights, the drooping temperatures, the joys of Christmas receding in the rearview mirror while the promise of spring feels far off–but the gloom sets in.

You know how it is. You try to savor the beauty of the winter snowfall, but suddenly your mind wraps around all the work that comes with it: digging the car out, shoveling the walk, washing all that muck and salt that collects on your boots. And do you have another pair of thick wool socks?

Need some help dispersing any January gloom? Try this:

1) Take a picture
Sometimes I don’t see the beauty of winter until I get out my iPhone (okay, I don’t mean to sound hopelessly 2017). The other day on my morning run I was noticing the ice on the river. I paused from my usual huffing and puffing around the park and snapped a shot.

It was only later, when I posted that picture to Instagram that I could see it: the bands of white and gray across the water and then mirroring in the cliffs, with a hint of pink where the rising sun was hitting it. It was beautiful.

2) Sing a song
You knew I’d say this. You don’t have to sing it out loud. Sing it to yourself. Can’t sing? Sure you can. My dad had a tin ear but he always sung lustily from the front pew (where he wouldn’t bother too many folks). I used to joke with him and tell him that he had about three notes–and sometimes they were the right ones.

The psalm says “Make a joyful noise to the Lord.” Nothing there about it having to be pretty.

3) Look up
Now that I got you thinking about your cell phone…look up from it. Look around you. Turn it off for a moment. The other day on my morning commute on a crowded subway train, I looked up from my phone and noticed that the man standing in front of me had a cane.

“Would you like to sit down?” I said. “That would be nice.” I got up, cursing myself for my self-involvement. At least I had finally noticed. I had looked up.

4) Know the temperatures WILL change
One winter our car was buried in snow, almost three feet of it. We spent days shoveling the snow and clearing it all off. It took almost a week. But guess what? Just as we finished, a warm spell hit and the rain came. The dirty snow all melted in a matter of days.

Trust God, trust nature. Things will change. That’s the way of the creation.

5) See the signs
The crocuses do come, the days slowly get longer, hope isn’t lost. I was walking by our neighbor’s place and noticed the sign “Hope” in the planter in front. A remnant from their Christmas decorations. It was still there. Bravely reminding me: “Hope is right here.”

5 Tips for Ensuring an Emotionally Healthy Christmas

Posted on March 10, 2026April 10, 2026 by Nicole Zasowski

If you’re anything like me, you love the traditions, the lights, the color and the joyous anticipation the holiday season inevitably brings. For many of us, these special moments and time-honored traditions are tied to those we love most dearly. While these are the people that make up our most precious memories, close family and friends can often bring up…stuff. This is the stuff we wish were different, the stuff from the past, the stuff we don’t like about ourselves. Unfortunately this “stuff” can prevent us from enjoying the people we love most during the holidays. Here are some things that I am wishing for from myself this Christmas that may be helpful to you as you visit your own loved ones.

1. Know Thyself

Know your sensitive spots. What makes you hurt? When you feel that hurt, what kind of hurt do you feel? Inadequate? Unsafe? Rejected? Alone? Where might that have come from? Chances are, every time you feel emotional pain, you are feeling the same two or three feelings no matter how diverse the situation or the people involved. These “sensitive spots” tend to come from life circumstances or relationships gone awry. What are yours?

Knowing our pain and where it comes from provides an opportunity to understand ourselves and realize the real truth about our situation rather than placing blame where it doesn’t belong. Once we are able to grasp what button may have been pushed, we have to own it! Having the humility to recognize when you are being reactive as a result of your own pain is a gift you can give yourself and others.

2. Give Grace

We all have these “sensitive spots” and we all have different ways we tend to cope with these feelings. Each one of our family and friends has their own pain and their own ways of coping. It’s no one’s fault, it just is. The best thing we can do for ourselves and others is to work on what’s on our own side of the fence and have compassion and understanding for what may be stirring on the other’s side. In doing this, we set the stage to enjoy peaceful interactions with our loved ones during the holidays.

3. Get clear on what you don’t do

Having healthy boundaries means knowing when to say “yes” and when to say “no.” While not everyone experiences this as challenging, many of us have difficulty knowing when to say, “no.” Often, this is because we are haunted by the word, “should.” We carry expectations about what we should be doing during the holiday season to make the season special for our loved ones or to carry on tradition. Instead of focusing on what we need to do, it can be helpful to articulate the things we don’t do. It used to be important to me to handwrite all of the addresses for my Christmas cards. There was just something that felt more personal about a hand-addressed card. But in this season, I have to let that go and decide that handwritten cards now belong on the list of things I no longer do. This is just one small example and there are many others. But it can be so freeing to make a list of things that are not life giving and may be taking time from the events or relationships that do matter to you.

4. Don’t abandon the routine … completely

The holidays offer a perfect opportunity to break from our routine to rest and enjoy time with loved ones. But sometimes we can find ourselves living in extremes. We are rigid in routines and push ourselves, struggling to find the time or reason to rest. And then when it comes time to rest and enjoy, we abandon all routine and structure. But the reality is that our choices and rhythms around rest and how we fuel our bodies can have a profound impact on how we feel emotionally. Life usually works best when we can keep a little routine in our rest and keep a little rest in our routine. Rather than living in extremes, we are wise to maintain more balance all year round.

5. Make others feel special

Someone once told me that there are two mentalities you can bring to a party. You can have a “look at me” mentality. Or, you can have a “there you are” mentality. Insecurity pulls us into ourselves, making it difficult to experience genuine connection with others. But being confident in our own significance leads us to help others be confident in their own. Talking to people in a way that makes them feel like they are the only person in the room is the best way to work a room.

Nicole Zasowski is a licensed marriage and family therapist and author of “From Lost to Found.” She is based in the state of Connecticut where she lives with her husband and two sons. As an old soul who wears her heart proudly on her sleeve, Nicole loves using her words to help others find an enduring peace and joy outside of circumstance.

1. Pray the Stations of the Cross as a family.

2. Give up social media for Lent.

3. Make a special effort to be patient with your loved ones.

4. Give up meat for Lent and try some new vegetarian recipes.

5. Spend time each day reading Scripture or a spiritual book.

6. Go on a retreat for Lent.

Get up and get out

See your life through another’s eyes

Use all your sense

Seek out wondrous displays

Look at things from new angels

Why Lent is Important for Teenagers

5 Tips to Celebrate Lent With Your Teen

1. Talk to your teenager about what they hope to accomplish during Lent.

2. Help your teen set realistic Lent goals

3. Create a plan to help them meet their Lent goals, including daily or weekly check-ins

4. Encourage and support them throughout the Lenten season

5. Celebrate your teen’s successes at the end of Lent

1. Acknowledge what you are feeling

2. Accept that your grief counts

3. Allow yourself to feel it

4. Recognize what’s in your control

5. Look for meaning